Sorry if this was posted before (even possibly by me...ooops *blush*) but it's been coming up a lot for me recently so I thought I'd get it off my chest. It's about my frustration with labeling ALL MAAB folks transfeminine and ALL FAAB folks transmasculine.
Recently, I've been getting referred to as transfeminine a lot more by folks who are attempting to be inclusive. But, rather than feel "included" by the term, the hard butch dyke in me just ends up feeling erased. For those who don't know me IRL, I'm covered in tattoos (incl. neck & knuckles), I wear feminine attire only once or twice a year (and it's usually only for performances), I own more plaid than I know what to do with, my hair is cut in a "Go Fish" kinda way, I've lasered off most of my dark hair but often sport long blonde ones on my chin, when I out myself as trans people often assume I'm on the trans male-spectrum, and I could go on and on. And yet, people still want to label me "feminine" simply for being of the female (albeit trans) persuasion.
Most of the time I don't say anything because I just simply don't have the energy to engage in these conversations. But inside I'm usually screaming "BEING FEMALE DOES NOT EQUAL BEING FEMININE." One time, after having my thoughts on this matter dismissed, I asked that person if they would consider Sinclair Sexsmith, Ivan E. Coyote, Lyndell Montgomery, or any of the lovely female-identified folks on Butchlab to be feminine, to which they replied "NO! Of course not!" Well than why me, just because my femaleness has that trans attachment before it?
Anyway end of my ranty rant rant. I really hope this doesn't come off as me ragging on femininity, cause I simply adore all things feminine/femme....just not.on.me.